Jokes, Puns and Cartoons for Quilters Just to make you smile. Why don’t side dishes tell jokes? They’re too corny.What do you say to the winner of the corn shucking contest? Corn-gratulations.Why did the cornbread get in trouble? It wouldn’t stop loafing around.Why should you never tell secrets in a cornfield? Because the corn has…
A label tells the who, what, when, and where of the quilts. Here are some other suggestions for your quilt label. Quilt Labels, Dedications, and PoemsAxioms, sayings, and truisms about quilting and quilt making. A Lifetime’s not too long to live as friends and a quilt is not too small to sew them in!A quilt…
How many times have you written last year on your checks? Just in case you aren’t sure, here is how to know you are living in the future: You accidentally enter your PIN on the microwave. You haven’t played solitaire with real cards in years. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach…
NOTES ABOUT THIS PAGE: These were collected from both E-Guild Lists and individual contributions and were compiled and maintained by Laura Starr of the UFO-rphanage for Quilters for many years. Laura has generously donated this page to us for your continued enjoyment. A paper cut (or other minor finger bleeder) is as devastating as a broken ankle….
Just Kidding! Here’s a handy guide to getting out those pesky fabric stains: Blood: Spill more blood around the area of stain so it won’t stand out as much. Ink: Fall to knees and plead, “Why, God, why? Why dost thou test me so?” Grass: Write the name of your liquid detergent on the stain….
On any given day the number of employees in a quilt shop is inversely proportional to the number of customers needing quick attention. Every quilt will take twice as long as you expect and be half as beautiful (we are never satisfied). There are only 2 kinds of masking tape: that which won’t stay on…
This makes a great gift. Place all the items along with a printout of what each item represents in a small basket. Then use yarn or ribbon to close the basket. (PS – We seem to be missing some letters! Contact Me if you would like to suggest one.) Aspirin: for all those harder projects to come…
Jokes, Puns and Cartoons for Quilters Q: Why did the Easter Bunny become a quilter? A. Because he had too many loose ends to tie up! Q: Why did the Easter Bunny take up quilting? A. He wanted to patch things up with his hare-loom relatives. Q: What’s the Easter Bunny’s go-to thread color? A….
The Verse by the Side of the Road Remember the Burma-Shave signs? Burma Shave roadside signs captivated highway travelers all over the country from the 1920s till the 1950s. The Burma-Shave signs came about after a similar product, known as Burma-Vita, began losing sales because of poor marketing strategies and an increase in competition.Burma-Vita, a…
To find out, just tell our fortune-telling quilter your name and she will tell you! Use lower case letters, please. First name: lower case letters Last name: lower case letters You are a: quilter!
